Friend Request Accepted
Keeping in touch with a particular circle looks different than it did ten years ago. We were saving the world from invasion, relentlessly pursued by zombies, and competing for Super Bowls. Now we send birthday messages, complain about property taxes, and share advice for family vacations. Spread out over the globe it’s amazing we have kept in touch all these years. Something about chainsawing your way through a horde of locusts really brings a group of guys together. Let me clear up some confusion. I am sharing how online gaming helped me make life-long meaningful friendships.
Becoming an adult sucks. There is no getting around it. I graduated from college, got my dream job, moved to the town where said dream job was located, and was ready to embark on an epic life adventure. Work was going well, bills were being paid with some left for savings, but I was not happy. I was not happy. I can say it now, but at the time I had a very hard time accepting it. The main reason was being away from friends. Growing up you are around buddies your age while sharing countless experiences. You see them every day. In college, I could have trouble sleeping at 2:00 a.m., and someone would still be up to talk to. Suddenly you are thrown into the real-world lion’s den mauled by new routines and expectations. Spectators are dressed as professionals who are at different stages of their careers. In my case, I was the youngest faculty member in the school where I taught. After the workday, I didn’t have anyone my age or who shared my interests to interact with. There was no place to escape and vent frustrations or celebrate victories because I didn’t think anyone would understand.
My first real experience with social media wasn’t Myspace, Facebook, Vine, or Twitter. It was more unconventional in the form of Xbox Live. A friend from college and I both made Xbox 360 purchases when they were released. This was before online gaming became popular with consoles. Xbox Live was convenient to create parties and chat with friends while playing each other or even different games. Most guys I know aren’t big phone-talkers. Chatting while playing games felt more natural. Instead of awkward silence, the void was filled with gaming. It was like old times. We could play games, chat, and hang out as if we were on the same couch, but from anywhere in the world. One game we really got into was a third-person shooter called Gears of War. The 4 versus 4 cover-based action had amazing graphics and would let others join your online matches. Over time, we started playing with the same people online, adding a few to our friend list each week. Our crew eventually settled to a band of online warriors close to the same age, and all at similar places in life. We were from Nebraska, Texas, Kentucky, Montreal, and Newfoundland but might as well have been just right down the hall from each other. Playing online a few times a week was a great way to blow off steam, chat about life, and give each other a hard time. Sometimes we would even coordinate meals while we played. A Friday-night session was usually paired with Eggo ham and cheese sandwiches. I liken those times to the movie Sandlot with the baseball-loving friends playing an endless game of ball every day at their make-shift ball diamond. Each meet-up brought more jokes, funny stories, and adventures.
Just like the Sandlot, we would grow busier and play less and less. Over time the online gaming faded away. Many of us still text, post on each other’s Facebook and keep in touch. It is crazy for me to think about how these relationships started over a video game. So, here’s to Rymorg, Cooldude, Drucifer, Darbfiend, AtomicClock, Sk33tz, Toetags, and the others who gave me something fun to look forward to each week while lifting my spirits. Thanks for your friendship over the years and I hope you’re all well. When you see people gaming, don’t assume they are being unsociable. It might be the most meaningful interaction they have all day. Just because you don’t see the other person doesn’t make it less authentic. This was a lot of fun for me, revisiting good memories. I’d love to talk more, but I have work in the morning. Bpete signed out.
